In honor of my father & my daughter’s father, Happy Father’s Day It’s my father’s remembrance this week, 14 years since he passed. As I reflect on the fact that I’ve now spent almost half of my life without him, I think of what he was to me as a father. I don’t remember in any roles, I remember that his laughter filled our house. He was a peacemaker, he de-escalated every tense situation I saw him in. I remember that he saw me as a person, we had conversations, I shared my thoughts and he shared his.
Dad and his kids
He was kind, so kind that even until today, I still reap direct favors from his kindness. I remember that his nieces largely funded our education and not once did we default. I remember that two of his friends drove for 12 hours to be at my introduction, they didn’t have to but they did, they showed up for him, and there were at least 20 of his friends from his secondary school at my wedding, he was loved by many.
I remember that it took my mom seven years to begin to pack up his clothes in their room. It always seemed like he was coming back, he isn’t. I remember that he loved us, loved us so much that we only know how to love ourselves as the family he left behind. He was peaceful yet his life ended violently without any justice. My father is memorable, you didn’t meet Azomaze and forget.
Dad, mom and the kiddos
Every year, we remember him during the period of Father’s Day and it couldn’t be more apt that he made his exit at this time. I’ve been blessed to witness two great fathers, my father, and my daughter’s father, my husband. I chuckle lightly when my husband rambles about something that makes him excited; my father did exactly the same, it is a shame they never met.
Mom, her kids, and grandkids
My husband’s laughter fills our home, you can perceive it when you come into our house, it is comforting. I see him be a father to our daughter, not from a place of duty but renewed commitment daily. When I love someone and make space for them in my life, my husband does the same naturally. In this partnership, I’ve never had to ask for that or anything else.
I’ve witnessed two amazing fathers, one was mine, one is my daughter’s. This experience is the wind beneath my wings in this challenging world. To all the fathers, Happy Father’s Day. May the hearts of your children swell with pride when they think of you.
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About The Author: Karo Omu is the founder of Sanitary Aid initiative (sanitaryaidng.com) and a lover of life. Connect with her on Instagram with @karoomu and @sanitaryaidng. And if you are a Twitter junkie as she is, check her out with— @duchesskk.