Written by Evi Idoghor, Creator of Letstalknationblog.com
Who else is sick of all the games men play with women these days? I will be the first one to put my hands up. When it comes to this thing called love/relationship, there is no scientific need for it to be complicated. Love in its purest form is intentional, straightforward, and sacrificial. Love should be backed up by actions. So, when you tell someone you love them, there should be something to show for it.
John 3:16 says, "for God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever should believe in Him, shall not perish, but have eternal life." From this statement, we can see God backing up the love He has for humanity by sacrificing His only son. He gave something that was precious to Him to express His love for us.
Now, speaking from a woman’s point of view, these days men know how to spit a lot of game, with no action whatsoever to show for it. Some will say—I like you a lot, to which I respond, Okay thank you, but what is there not to like? You like me, but to call me is wahala (a hassle). You like me, but communication on a regular basis is like pulling teeth.
Relationships Shouldn't be Complicated
There is nothing mystical about being in a relationship; if someone is really into you, they will show you, period. I had to have a serious conversation with myself one day. I had to remind myself, that I had been in situations where young men pulled all the stops to show me they were interested. I did not have to beg them to call me; I did not have to contemplate hours before calling them, because of the fear that they may not pick up my calls.
I did not have to wonder if they liked me or not because I knew they did from the way they showed me. As such, I had to stop buying into society’s way of doing things, I had to cut out all that noise about doing certain things to get a man’s attention by playing certain games. I had to tell myself that if a man wanted me, there was nothing that could stop him from communicating his intentions towards me; it’s not that complicated, it’s easy.
Unfortunately, some women have bought into the narrative that they have to play their part to grab a man’s attention even if the said man, has a string of women attached to them. Listen, there is no true love within such a person for you if they are busy entertaining other people and are not willing to let go of the ninety-nine, to chase the one. To them, you are just an option that they can pick up and put back down anytime they want to. However, you are much more valuable than that. When you know your self-worth, you won't allow people to play games with you, you wouldn’t give your time to those who are not worth it.
Why You Deserve Happiness
Your happiness begins with you. You have to love, honor, and respect yourself. If you don’t, no one will do that for you. Happiness comes from within when you finally accept yourself as the prized possession that you are, and are not willing to settle for anything less than what God has for you.
I remember an episode from the hit-show friends, where Rachael was in a low place because she was in love with Ross and he had a girlfriend. Since she couldn’t be with him, she went back to some guy she dated in the past who she knew made a pass at her friend, Phoebe. When Ross discovered she had gotten back with said guy, he pulled her aside and advised her to let go of the relationship, because he was no good for her. He said—you deserve to be with someone who wakes up every morning, and says, gosh! I’m with Rachael!
What happened to the days when men were excited to be with women? Now, if they are talking to you, it seems like they are doing you a favor! What Ross said to Rachel in that episode, pulled on my heartstrings because he just reminded her that she was valuable, and didn’t have to settle. She deserved to be with someone who honored and respected her—she deserved to be happy.
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