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Lagos Chronicles Part 2

Updated: Nov 16, 2020

Hmmm…guys! That is how they almost beat me on these Lagos streets last Sunday oh! Let me tell you what happened. So I had attended an event at a church in Ikoyi the Saturday before and it was awesome. Seeing that the same vibe was going to be carried on to the next day which was a Sunday, I decided to head to Ikoyi again for church.

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The church at Ikoyi is not my regular Sunday church, but I attend some discipleship classes there and whenever they have special events I show up as well. Some of you might wonder—why don’t you just go there on Sundays since you love it that much? Well it is quite a distance from where I live right now and on Sundays I usually just want to get to church and be back home in time for my after church nap (those are the best!)

So anyway, I bumped into my friend’s sister at the church that Saturday and asked her if she would make it to church the next day and she said yea! On that fateful Sunday morning, she called me to pick her up on my way to church. I woke up a bit excited that day, because of the high I got from the Saturday service. I dressed up really nice; with my blonde wig freshly flat ironed, my pink undertone maxi dress and flat sandals with a purse to match my entire look—ah you never know when you might bump into Mr. Perfect, (and yes we are still on that journey!)

Fresh out of the Lagos ban that included okadas (bikes) and kekes (tricycles), the streets were free and I was cruising to my friend’s house. I got into Agungi and called her to start making her way out of her estate. As I was about to turn into the estate, I did not have my blinkers on when I noticed an okada rider coming with full speed by my side.

I quickly slammed my breaks and the first one escaped. The one coming up behind him slammed on his breaks as well and in the process toppled over together with the three passengers he was carrying; a man, his wife and their son who I estimated to be about nine years old.

Now, I wound down saying sorry to them, trying to explain myself saying I did not see them as they were on my blind spot. That was when people gathered oh, screaming for me to get down from my vehicle.

The father of the boy came to me saying that I should get down from my car and he was also going to slap me! I’m like see me see wahala oh! There was no impact between my car and the okada. I did not hit them, neither did they hit me. As soon as I noticed they were coming in full speed, I stopped. Then one amebo guy started trying to open my car, by putting his hands through my window. I quickly wound up and made sure the car doors were locked.

They kept on screaming at me; because of the young boy who fell off the bike, I decided to come down. Then his father said to me while bringing out a deadbeat ID card:

Can you see this ID card? I am a military man and I will deal with you as I please!

His wife was also crying—this is the only one I have oh!

In reference to her son.

In the midst of the military man’s threats and his wife’s tears, some people said I had to take the boy to the hospital and made sure they did an x-ray on him, in case of any internal injury.I’m like okay no problem. Luckily for me, the incident happened right in front of a hospital, so a security guard who was around was kind enough to carry the boy on his back and walked to the hospital.

According to them, the crime I committed was that I did not indicate that I was about to make a turn. Of which I was like okay cool! My bad! Lord knows I only came down from my car because of the child.

While we got into the reception, we were asked what happened and who was going to cover the bill and I told them I was going to take care of it. I then called my friends sister to join me at the hospital. I was just going to handle my business jeje, and then head to church if that was still a possibility.

So the doctor said there was no need for an x-ray because a good ole’ ultrasound would reveal if there was any damage done to the boy’s body internally. Now we had to wait on the sonographer to get to the hospital to perform the scan. That one took almost an hour to get there. The little boy was lying on a bed in the room, while we waited at the reception. Then I overheard the Mr. Military saying to his wife that he was going to slap me. In his words—I will slap this lady, I will slap her.

Brothers and sisters, please tell me what my crime was? That was deserving of someone putting their hands on me?

As I heard him say that, I proceeded to call my brother sharp sharp! No dulling oh!

Hello, Tobo, somebody is threatening to slap me oh!

Eh? Why? I am coming! He also called some of my other cousins to start making their way down there. Then I called my mom’s sister who is an officer in Ikoyi Prisons and told her somebody wanted to slap me! I needed to say no more; she rushed down from church with her husband and two of my cousins.

So Mrs. Military was being dramatic—what kind of thing is this on a first Sunday eh? Back to sender oh!

I just laughed, no be me wan kill una oh. I said to myself.

Before they got there, Mr. Military came up to me and said:

Madam, I am about to go to church (whipping out his phone), so give me your phone number.

Me: why do you want my number? We are settling this matter here today!

Mr. M: madam please, I don’t have time for all of this!

Me: I am not giving you my number!

Then the receptionist interjected saying he did not have to get my number; she was going to sort out the matter.

So the caring father and loving husband left his wife and child in the custody of a total stranger and went to church.

Ah! that was his saving grace oh!

I am a very quiet and reserved person (got that from my father), but God placed me in the midst of family members wey dey crase! By the time eight people showed up at that small reception of the hospital, the staff were surprised!

One of them said—madam, but I thought we had settled this matter now.

How can it be settled, when a grown man was threatening to slap me and deal with me as he pleased? Is that how a situation should be handled?

My uncle went on to say if it was a man driving the car, would they have said anything? My aunt was ready to fight the man uniform versus uniform! Ah he was lucky he left! My brother could not wait to see the man who wanted to slap his sister. Then man’s poor wife was not able to defend the situation, as we were now the majority. Initially they thought I was without a support system; when she saw everyone, she calmed down. The scan was eventually carried out and there was nothing wrong with the child (thank God).

My brother paid for the bill; he was going to do 50% of the payment just because that man had threatened his sister, but he went ahead to cover everything.

We left the hospital with the woman thanking us in the end. As soon as we got outside, my brother said—come Evi, you will pay me my money back (haha). The whole incident just messed up my morning; I got to church at the tail end of service and was just disoriented.

It is just so sad that we live in a society where people turn to violence as the first port of call to solve a problem. People have been wrongfully accused of certain crimes and have died as a result of jungle justice or this mob mentality that individuals carry. If you did not see someone physically attack someone else, there is no reason for you to respond in a violent manner.

God forbid that I even hit the bike man; should I then be beaten because of an accident? Even if it was my fault? Only God knows whether that man hits his wife on a regular basis, because you cannot see a young woman and the first thing you want to do to her is give her a slap because of a traffic mishap.

Should an okada even be carrying four passengers at once? Isn’t that a risky venture? Maybe that was the reason they even fell off the bike. It is because people react this way that when things like these occur, no one stops to salvage the matter. We need to do better as a nation and hold ourselves accountable! Nigerians when something happens on the street, rather than gather to beat up the person, be the voice of reason! I will give it to the security men around who calmed the situation down!

Lord knows if that man had put his hands on me, my gosh! He would be locked up somewhere right now! Guys don’t try me on these Lagos streets oh! My family doesn’t take nonsense! Haha!

What do you guys think about this conversation? Was I at fault? Should I have stopped? Let’s talk about it! Leave your comments below. Also remember to like, share and subscribe never to miss an update!

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About The Author: Evi Idoghor is a Christian, writer, and content creator on She is a chemical engineering graduate from the University of Louisiana at Lafayette. Consumed by her love for writing and desire to effect change, she launched her online platform––Let’s Talk Nation––to tap into her creativity and start meaningful conversations that would make a difference around the world.

Most of her writing has been influenced by her time spent in America, where she lived for about 11 years. Also, she lived in Nigeria and South Korea and currently loves traveling the world while learning about other fascinating cultures. You can find her on all social media platforms with @eviidoghor.

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