I Was Once Jealous of My Friend


Who remembers the story of Cain and Abel? It can be found in the book of Genesis (4) in the Bible. Cain was jealous of his brother Abel because God accepted Abel’s offerings, but often rejected that of Cain. When Cain asked God the reason for His partiality, God answered: “Why are you angry and why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted?

When we think about jealousy, we usually associate it with people who are ‘horrible.’ But all of us at a particular point or phase in our lives, have been jealous of someone else. It could be their success, their family, their relationship, and so on. I know this because I have been jealous. Yes, I have. And I have been jealous of my friend, my close friend. At that point in my life, I was slowly building my confidence back up. I was on fire for God and was spending almost every waking moment with Him. Be it through bible study, listening to sermons, service in the church, and listening to worship songs, most of the time.

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I became stronger in my Christian faith. I had a lot of things I was believing God for, I mean I had a whole list of things. I felt that since I was no longer fornicating, since I no longer had a relationship that was distracting me from Him, then He was obligated to answer all my prayers; in the way, I wanted it and the time frame I wanted it. But how many of us know that God is not a respecter of anybody? The Bible says that just as far as the heavens are from the earth, so are His ways from our ways, and His thoughts, from our thoughts.

God, I need a husband, God I need a job that would file a permanent residency for me. God, I need this, God I need that. But it was as if God mistook me for someone else. The things I was praying for, someone else was getting the results. Hello! God! I thought you were all knowing or all powerful; it’s me asking for these favors, not her. But my blessings did not come, at least not yet. I was distraught. God, I am saving myself, God I am turning down advances from guys, God I am spending my entire time with you. In fact, people are beginning to call me pastor, and they are getting tired of me talking about God and church all the time. Yes I know, I can see it in their facial expressions. But yet you are giving someone else, the very things I am praying for.

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Then I became jealous; I didn’t want to hear her talk about her new opportunities. Can we talk about something else? I often asked her in my head! In my head because I didn’t want to seem like a hater. I didn’t hate her, far from it. But I was just jealous. You know jealousy stems from a lack of contentment of your own life. When you are not happy with the way your life is going, when you are not satisfied with what you have, and when you don’t know what your purpose is.

God has given every one of us a purpose. If you don’t know what your purpose is, and you are not doing anything with your life, discontentment sets in, and jealousy follows suit — jealousy of others who are walking in their purpose, jealousy of others who are making things happen. When I discovered my purpose and started walking in it, my perspective on life changed. I saw my gifts come to life; my light began to shine even brighter. I became appreciative of God more. I understood my time and season. I understood that God was big enough for us all. And I understood this passage of scripture which says: “The eyes of all look expectantly to You, and You give them their food in due season. You open Your hand and satisfy the desire of every living thing.Psalm 145:15-16.

The keywords in the above passage are Due Season. We all have times and seasons in our lives; God has predestined to bless us and cause us to shine. Think about it; some people pop up from nowhere and become the next big thing when they least expect it. It is as if the whole world, now knows their name. Everyone wants them on their show, magazine cover, events, etc. That is that person’s due season. What the person has been believing God for, and even more has now come to pass. It may not be on a grandeur scale for you. Maybe for you, it is getting a series of contracts, multiple high paying job offers, or admission into ivy league universities. 

That is God’s way of showing you that it is your time and turn to be blessed.

So when we see that happening for others, rather than getting jealous, let us rejoice with them, let us celebrate them because we know that God is good, and He will not withhold any good thing from us, and our time and season to be satisfied is well underway. Thank God I was able to manage my jealousy. Thank God it didn’t lead to hatred or spite for my dear friend.

Others take it a step further and start to spread hate about the person they are jealous of or do something horrible to bring them down (Cain eventually killed Abel). If you are dealing with jealousy today, don’t feel ashamed. You are not the only one on the planet that has dealt with it. But don’t let it consume you, and ask God to reveal to you, your areas of discontent, and also your unique purpose. So you can start walking in it and be carried away by the things He has purposed for you to do.

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About The Author: Evi Idoghor is a Christian, writer and content creator on Letstalknationblog.com. She is a chemical engineering graduate from the University of Louisiana at Lafayette. Consumed by her love for writing and desire to effect change, she launched her online platform––Let’s Talk Nation––to tap into her creativity and start meaningful conversations that would make a difference around the world.

Most of her writing has been influenced by her time spent in America, where she lived for about 11 years. Also, she lived in Nigeria and South Korea and currently loves traveling the world while learning about other fascinating cultures. You can find her on all social media platforms with @eviidoghor.

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